Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Lesson #2: Never settle
So, we were greeted at the door. It never ceases to amaze me that people rarely look like their photos. They are generally older and heavier. At least that seems to be the trend. And the husband was definitely heavier. I'm talking the man was probably pushing 250lbs and was maybe 5'7". Lucky me.
I try not to be too critical of weight, since I'm not perfect, but I'm also not obese, either. In the south, the term is thick. I am thick. There. I said it.
We started with hugs, which made me mildly uncomfortable. At the same time, these people were going to be seeing us naked soon and much much more. So hugs...made sense. And I tamped down my discomfort with seeing my man hug this other woman. If I couldn't take that, I was really in trouble.
Soon we were drinking and talking about sex. We discussed our sexual experiences, our sexual preferences, and of course: our rules. Well, since my biggest rule was that he wouldn't be in another woman, we were already off to a lousy start knowing this was full swap. Our other rules included that there be no kissing. I had to draw the intimacy line somewhere. And my man was in complete vehement agreement. Also, I didn't want anyone else going down on me. There's something about opening wide for someone's tongue. Ummm, no thank you.
After the drinks kicked in, we played Body Bingo. I love that game. We brought it, thinking it would make a lovely ice breaker. It was. Although soon it was obvious the game was rigged and that people were just doing what they wanted. Every one of them managed to lick and suck my nipples. Not so bad. I knew that watching a woman suck on me was a huge turn on for him.
Not as much of a turn on was me watching her go down on him for several minutes. Still, I smiled and powered through while she worked his raging hard on. Oh, and he was hard.
I stuck through giving the husband his turn in my mouth. He was small. So very small. So much smaller than my man. Dammit. I was really not making out well in this.
The worse part was coming out of the bathroom to find my man eating her out in the middle of the living room. He was on his knees and she was straddling his face. And I just wanted to go right then.
We had talked before we left. We talked all through the drive. And he promised me that I would never doubt that I was the most important person in the room. He promised me that he would mouth 'I love you' all the time. He was already failing miserably.