Thursday, January 6, 2011
Lesson #4: Safe words
One done, all done.
That was their rule and though they looked incredibly disappointed, they followed it. And it was over. I have never dressed so fast or picked up so efficiently in all my life. That's saying something.
We headed out to the car. And as we walked he tried to talk to me.
man: Lexi? Lexi say something.
me: Don't talk to me.
I needed time to collect myself. I needed time to hash through it all. And we did. We talked the whole way home. And we agreed on some key points.
We were never ever ever going to full swap again. And he was going to follow through with my main sticking point, making stupid crazy mad passionate love to me at home so that I'd be reassured we were okay.
We stopped at a bar to get a night cap. And I just wanted to go. There were only chicks in there. Chick behind the bar. Chicks sitting at the bar.
In an effort to acquire our shots, he had to keep leaning over this one chick. And she was smiling and chatting with him. And I was completely over any female being near my man. My jealous nature was in over-drive. I very nearly lost it.
He pulled me to an out of the way table to sit and talk.
me: Why here?
man: I thought I might be getting yelled at.
me: You thought right.
And I finally was able to calmly explain why I was so very upset. He never looked at me and told me he loved me. He was way too into her. It hurt.
Soon he was holding his head in shame.
man: Lexi, I am so sorry. I forgot. She was so aggressive. I just forgot.
me: Just take me home and make me forget. I'll be fine.
man: Next time...we keep to our rules. Next time...we have a safe word.
me: Ice cream. Our safe word...is ice cream.