Saturday, December 18, 2010
A new kind of first
So, it's not terribly sexy, but I'm a girl. I don't have a penis. They are an object of deep fascination for me. And so, I have at times, offered to help him pee.
It has taken so many stages.
First, he couldn't even pee with me in the same room.
Then, after some time living together, he managed it.
So, to me, the next logical step would be to let me hold it. (I never want us to number two in the same room. I have my limits. And some things should be left to the imagination.)
Last weekend, in a moment of absolute bravery, he offered to let me hold it. And it went horribly wrong. Pee on the walls. Pee on the cabinet. Pee on the floor. Thank God, he was able to stop mid-stream or I can only imagine how much worse it could have been.
Then, last night, he decided to brave it again.
man: Don't pinch it.
me: I'm not pinching it.
man: You're pinching it. Like this.
And he showed me how to hold it. Who knew, but with his body in my way, I'm a lefty!
Then he gave me a key piece of information our last attempt lacked.
man: Now watch out. It's going to kick up when I start.
Ah ha! Guess what? I did it! Success. Pee...in the TOILET!
man: Remember. Only shake it twice. More than that and you're playing with it.
Damn. Oh, but I still plan on playing with it later. Heh heh heh.